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Crompton, Richmal, 1890-1969

"More William"


It is well to draw a veil over the next half-hour. Both William and
the meal had vanished. Robert tore his hair and appealed vainly to the
heavens. He hinted darkly at suicide. For what is cold tongue and
coffee to offer to an Ideal? The meal was discovered during the
afternoon in its resting-place and given to William's mongrel, Jumble,
who crept about during the next few days in agonies of indigestion.
Robert had bitterly demanded of William why he went about the world
spoiling people's lives and ruining their happiness. He had implied
that when William met with the One and Only Love of his Life he need
look for no help or assistance from him (Robert), because he (William)
had dashed to the ground his (Robert's) cup of happiness, because he'd
never in his life met anyone before like Miss Laing, and never would
again, and he (William) had simply condemned him to a lonely and
miserable old age, because who'd want to marry anyone that asked them
to lunch and then gave them coffee and cold tongue, and he'd never
want to marry anyone else, because it was the One and Only Love of his
Life, and he hoped he (William) would realise, when he was old enough
to realise, what it meant to have your life spoilt and your happiness
ruined all through coffee and tongue, because someone you'd never
speak to again had hidden the lunch. Whence it came that William,
optimist though he was, felt that any appeal to Robert for funds would
be inopportune, to say the least of it.


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