"I have outgrown all foolish notions," he said to himself, believing that
the capacity was dead within him for that blind unreasoning passion which
poets of the Byronic school have made of love. "What I want is a wife; a
wife of my own rank, or a little above me in rank; a wife who will be true
and loyal to me, who knows the world well enough to forgive my antecedents,
and to be utterly silent about them, and who will help me to make a
position for myself in the future. A man must be something in this world.
It is a hard thing that one cannot live one's own life; but it seems
inevitable somehow."
His mother had helped not a little to the bringing about of this
engagement. She knew that her son's bachelor life had been at best a wild
one; not so bad as it was supposed to be, of course, since nothing in this
world ever is so bad as the rest of the world supposes it; and she was very
anxious to see him safely moored in the sheltered harbour of matrimony. She
was a proud woman, and she was pleased that her son should have an earl's
daughter for his wife; and beyond this there was the fact that she liked
Lady Geraldine. The girl who had been too proud to let the man she loved
divine the depth of her feeling, had not been too proud to exhibit her
fondness for his mother. There had grown up a warm friendship between these
two women; and Mrs. Fairfax's influence had done much, almost unknown
to her son, to bring about this result of his chronic flirtation with
Geraldine Challoner.
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