" I replied that the difficulty was to find anything I
did like. He smiled at this, and said that I need not be afraid of
breaking down; he sounded me, and said that I was perfectly strong.
"Indeed," he added, "you might go to a dozen doctors to be examined
for an insurance policy, and you would be returned as absolutely
robust." In the course of his investigations, he applied a test,
quite casually and as if he were hardly interested, the point of
which he thought (I suppose) that I should not divine.
Unfortunately I knew it, and I need only say that it was a test for
something very bad indeed. That was rather a horrible moment, when
a grim thing out of the shadow slipped forward for a moment, and
looked me in the face. But it was over in an instant, and he went
on to other things. He ended by saying: "Mr. ----, you are not as
bad as you feel, or even as you think. Just take it quietly; don't
overdo it, but don't be bored. You say that you can't write to
please yourself at present. Well, this experience is partly the
cause, and partly the result of your condition. You have used one
particular part of your brain too much, and you must give it time
to recover. My impression is that you will get better very
gradually, and I can only repeat that there is no sort of cause for
anxiety.
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