"
To which I answered, "Very well"--and turned stupidly back upon that
nightmare thought--was Lillian in the court?
* * * * *
At last, a voice, the judge's I believe, for it was grave, gentle, almost
compassionate, asked us one by one whether we had anything to say in our
own defence. I recollect an indistinct murmur from one after another of the
poor semi-brutes on my left; and then my attorney looking up to me, made
me aware that I was expected to speak. On the moment, somehow, my whole
courage returned to me. I felt that I must unburden my heart, now or never.
With a sudden effort I roused myself, and looking fixedly and proudly at
the reverend face opposite, began:
"The utmost offence which has been proved against me is a few bold words,
producing consequences as unexpected as illogical. If the stupid ferocity
with which my words were misunderstood, as by a horde of savages rather
than Englishmen;--if the moral and physical condition of these prisoners at
my side;--of those witnesses who have borne testimony against me, miserable
white slaves, miscalled free labourers;--ay, if a single walk through the
farms and cottages on which this mischief was bred, affords no excuse for
one indignant sentence--"
There she was! There she had been all the time--right opposite to me, close
to the judge--cold, bright, curious--smiling! And as our eyes met, she
turned away, and whispered gaily something to a young man who sat beside
her.
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