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Hornung, E. W. (Ernest William), 1866-1921

"The Amateur Cracksman"

Two
or three stertorous breaths, and the man was a log.
I removed the handkerchief; I extracted the keys from his pocket.
In less than five minutes I put them back, after winding the
picture about my body beneath my Inverness cape. I took some
whiskey and soda-water before I went.
The train was easily caught--so easily that I trembled for ten
minutes in my first-class smoking carriage--in terror of every
footstep on the platform, in unreasonable terror till the end.
Then at last I sat back and lit a cigarette, and the lights of
Waterloo reeled out behind.
Some men were returning from the theatre. I can recall their
conversation even now. They were disappointed with the piece
they had seen. It was one of the later Savoy operas, and they
spoke wistfully of the days of "Pinafore" and "Patience." One of
them hummed a stave, and there was an argument as to whether the
air was out of "Patience" or the "Mikado." They all got out at
Surbiton, and I was alone with my triumph for a few intoxicating
minutes. To think that I had succeeded where Raffles had failed!
Of all our adventures this was the first in which I had played a
commanding part; and, of them all, this was infinitely the least
discreditable. It left me without a conscientious qualm; I had
but robbed a robber, when all was said.


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