Curiously enough we received no invitations
for any other day during that week, and just before that eventful Thursday
we received a letter from Mrs. Grant cancelling the invitation on account of
the death of one of her relations, so that we had to dine at home after all.
Now we Chinese make no such distinctions between days.
Every day of the week is equally good; in order however to avoid clashing
with other peoples' engagements, we generally fix Fridays
for our receptions or dinners, but there is not among the Chinese
an entertainment season as there is in Washington, and other great cities,
when everybody in good society is busy attending or giving
"At Homes", tea parties or dinners. I frequently attended
"At Homes" or tea parties in half-a-dozen places or more in one afternoon,
but no one can dine during the same evening in more than one place.
In this respect America might learn a lesson from China. We can accept
half-a-dozen invitations to dinner for one evening; all we have to do
is to go to each place in turn, partake of one or two dishes,
excuse ourselves to the host and then go somewhere else.
By this means we avoid the seeming rudeness of a declination,
and escape the ill feelings which are frequently created in the West
by invitations being refused. The Chinese method makes possible
the cultivation of democratic friendships without violating
aristocratic instincts, and for candidates at election times
it would prove an agreeable method by which to make new friends.
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