No; Austin must be left out; there were three things to do: One of them
was to pay Neergard; another to sever Gerald's connection with him for
ever; and the third thing to be done was something which did not concern
Gerald or Austin--perhaps, not even Ruthven. It was to be done, no
matter what the cost. But the thought of the cost sent a shiver over
him, and left his careworn face gray.
His head sank; he fixed his narrowing eyes on the floor and held them
there, silent, unmoved, while within the tempests of terror, temptation,
and doubt assailed him, dragging at the soul of him, where it clung
blindly to its anchorage. And it held fast--raging, despairing in the
bitterness of renunciation, but still held on through the most dreadful
tempest that ever swept him. Courage, duty, reparation--the words
drummed in his brain, stupefying him with their dull clamour; but he
understood and listened, knowing the end--knowing that the end must
always be the same for him. It was the revolt of instinct against
drilled and ingrained training, inherited and re-schooled--the insurgent
clamour of desire opposed to that stern self-repression characteristic
of generations of Selwyns, who had held duty important enough to follow,
even when their bodies died in its wake.
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