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Milne, A. A. (Alan Alexander), 1882-1956

"Mr. Pim Passes By"

Well, dear, you see-that's how things are--one
can't get away from--er------
OLIVIA. What you feel is that Telworthy has the greater claim? You are
prepared to--make way for him?
GEORGE. Both the Church and the Law would say that I had no claim at all,
I'm afraid. I--I suppose I haven't.
OLIVIA. I see. (_She looks at him curiously_.) Thank you for making it so
clear, George.
GEORGE. Of course, whether or not you go back to--er--Telworthy is
another matter altogether. (_Crossing to fireplace_.) That would
naturally be for you to decide.
OLIVIA (_cheerfully_). For me and Jacko to decide.
GEORGE. Er--Jacko?
OLIVIA. I used to call my first husband--I mean my only husband--Jacko. I
didn't like the name of Jacob, and Jacko seemed to suit him somehow.
(_Enjoying the joke_.) He had very long arms. (GEORGE _is very annoyed_.)
Poor Jacko.
GEORGE (_annoyed_). You don't seem to realize that this is not a joke,
Olivia.
OLIVIA (_still amused_). It may not be a joke, but it is funny, isn't it?
GEORGE. I must say I don't see anything funny in a tragedy that has
wrecked two lives.
OLIVIA. Two? Oh, but Jacko's life isn't wrecked. It has just been
miraculously restored to him. And a wife, too. There's nothing tragic for
Jacko in it.
GEORGE (_stiffly_). I was referring to _our_ two lives--yours and mine.
OLIVIA. Yours, George? Your life isn't wrecked. The Court will absolve
you of all blame; your friends will sympathize with you, and tell you
that I was a designing woman who deliberately took you in; your Aunt
Julia--
GEORGE (_overwrought_).


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