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Grant, Robert, 1852-1940

"The Opinions of a Philosopher"

"But you are an angel, dear."
It was worth being defeated for Congress in order to learn how much my
wife appreciated me, and also to learn to appreciate her more
thoroughly, philosophical deductions which I whispered in her ear with
appropriate circumlocution. "But, Josephine," I added, "why do you
include Spinney and Nick Long in the same category of wickedness?"
"Because they are both wicked."
"But Nick is a reformer, my dear."
"Hasn't he nearly ruined you?"
"I had to hand over a great deal of money to him, certainly," I
answered, ruefully.
"What did he spend it for?"
"I didn't ask him for the details, but he always said he needed it for
printing, dear. You know there was a great deal of printing done," I
hastened to add, feeling a little nervous under the stress of
cross-examination. "Then there were the uniforms and the torches and
the supper for the cadets."
"I know what they cost exactly. Fred, what do you suppose he could
have used all that money for?"
"Printing, I have told you, Josephine. There are all sorts of expenses
in a campaign of this sort, the details of which one has to leave to
one's manager. I have implicit confidence in Nick's good judgment," I
continued, a trifle austerely. To tell the truth, I had been wondering
myself where all the money had gone to.


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